THE RESULTS ARE IN!

I didn't come in last in the Gardner Canyon Grind.  As a matter of fact I absolutely destroyed, well, one guy.  I beat him though and that is an accomplishment I can stand on, point to and say, "See!!!  I have arrived!"  

Now if you continue to look at those results (click the link dummy), you will notice that every man over the age of 39 who raced beat me.  That is irrelevant.  You see, my excuse... uhh, er, the REASON that happened is because they all cheated.  Yep, we are going to go with that answer.  Cheated I say!  To be honest I don't even know if they did the same number of laps as I did.  If I had to guess though, they did a longer one and still destroyed me.  If you remember a previous post these are the guys who passed me within the first 2 minutes 15 seconds even though they started after I did.  

Good on ya guys!

Death by Mountain Bike

Apparently I'm not a smart man.  I went riding today.  I did almost everything right.  I ate well before I left the  house.  I had a bottle of sports drink on the way to the trail.  I brought plenty of food and a full camelbak on the ride.  I took it easy on the trails: stopping when I needed a rest and taking it easy through the washes and rough parts.

Now we get to the almost part.  I almost remembered to put on sunscreen.  I had it with me, I just forgot to use it.  I almost stopped after the first 3.5 hours.  Almost.  You see, at this point I am down to a half liter of water and thinking that I really ought to call it a day and ride tomorrow.  Then someone offered me some water, so I took it and I went riding some more.  

I decided to go up to a trail called The National.  This is an absolute bear of a trail that I have heard is well on the expert side.  I only intended to check out where the trailhead was.  Then someone offered to show me exactly where it started and actually recommended a different loop that wasn't so difficult.  At some point I met up with another rider and he lead me through the tough parts and we rode for another 2.5 hours.

My legs cramped up when I got out of the car after the ride.  Well, they cramped quite a few times before that, but that was the last one, and the one that almost made me fall down.  Fun.

I wonder how tomorrows ride is going to be.

My light is possessed

It's really annoying.  My light in my office (my only vaguely furnished room) is possessed.  I bought a torch lamp, even though my sister told me that they aren't cool any more for my office because I knew that it would provide lots of light for my desk as well as my bike work stand.  I bought the cheapest of them, and it had a nice feature.  It is a touch to turn on light.  All you have to do is touch the metal and it turns on, or more specifically goes through the three steps of a 3-way bulb.  

Unfortunately, for some reason it will just cycle through all the modes.  Just a moment ago it went from full on, to off, to low, med, hi, off, low, med... hi... off, low... med, hi, off.

Fun.  If it were slightly faster it would be like a strobe and I could turn on some techno music and have a rave.  Hmmm.  I think I need a new light.

My first race

I raced in the Gardner Canyon Grind in Sonoita, Arizona this past weekend. Ok, so this didn't go very well. No really, that isn't just me saying that, I really did poorly. I raced in the Sport 30-39 group.  My group started 2 minutes ahead of the next group to go.  Technically we should have been faster and the reason we started sooner is so that the group behind us wasn't slowing us down.

After about 2 minutes of racing I think I was about 3 minutes behind the rest of the field.  After about 2 minutes and 13 seconds the majority of the group behind me passed me.  Not sure how that happened, I think I was in a time warp, yea, time warp, that explains it.

I went out there this weekend to have a great time.  I did.  I went out there to finish. I did.  I went out there to validate my nutrition strategy for longer events.  I failed miserably.  Ok, not really, I validated that I have no idea how much food I need per 30 minutes on the trail, so I succeeded, but not exactly how I planned to.  Back to the drawing board on that one.  Not an excuse, but I didn't do myself any favors when I went on a 3 hour bike ride the day before the race.  Not a great idea but I knew that and it all works out in the end, I accomplished what I set out to do.

The Pivot did fantastic.  As happens with nearly every new bike, the cables that control the shifting stretched.  Unfortunately they did this about half way through the race.  I had to stop and adjust the shifters and that was when the 60 year old passed me.  I never saw him again.  

That made me sad.

All in all a great time.  I am now attempting to put the bike back together.  I think the roughness of the trail actually loosened every single bolt.  I am going through and checking them one by one.  I found one that might have been responsible for some of my shifting woes.

Or it could be that I suck.  I think I will go with that answer. 

Exactly where is "here" and why is it different?

I am no longer in the Army.  It is official.  Ok, no it isn't.  It won't be official until the end of April, but it might as well be.  I am starting a new job on Monday the 17th that I am extremely excited about.  I am going to be a Value Stream Manager with a company called Triumph Air Repair.  What that means is essentially that I will be a production manager for a company that repairs Auxiliary Power Units that go on commercial and military aircraft.  Lots of fun and I have always been fascinated by the aircraft industry, so this is perfect!

I now live in Chandler, Arizona.  It is part of Phoenix and is a wonderful place to live.  The weather, so far, is fantastic.  The people are friendly.  The drivers are non-aggressive.  The stores and restaurants are plentiful and I live in an apartment complex that has a sand beach at the pool and two sand volleyball courts.  Very nice, I should probably go take advantage of that some time...

Here is a shot of me entering my apartment for the first time.  Cheesy, I know, but here you go anyway.  I did some painting in the apartment, more on that later.

I've got a new ride

Yep, I went ahead and bought a new bike.  I know, that isn't much of a surprise for anyone who actually knows me.  I rode it today at South Mountain in Phoenix.  It was fantastic.  Now, I know I don't have the bike dialed in yet, I still have some playing to do with the suspension and I really need to get used to the way the tires bite (of course that could just be my lack of familiarity with riding in sand.)  None of that seemed to matter though.  The ride was fast, very fast with me taking sections of trail that would have scared me too much to even try on other bikes I have ridden.

The bike is made by a company called Pivot Cycles beautiful.  She is anodized blue with red bits all over.  Here are some gratuitous bike shots, because I like to do that.

The ride was fantastic.  I kept thinking, "I shouldn't be able to go this fast on a bike I have never ridden on trails I have never seen." On the other hand I was able to do it just fine.  No problems at all.

The trails are fast and swoopy.  The trail I rode was called Desert Classic and I started from the Pima Canyon trailhead in Phoenix.  Lots of fun, and while a beginner trail, it was perfect for me today, I didn't want to ride too hard and I haven't been off-road in over a year, and then only for two rides on a borrowed bike.

So tomorrow I will go out for a short ride.  Pivot is doing a demo at South Mountain in the morning and I want to see if I can score a free t-shirt by riding up on my Pivot.  We will see but I don't want to ride too hard because I am going to go to a race this weekend.  Yea, that's a good idea...

Now this doesn't really make sense...

I recently bought a pair of sport sandals from Keen.  

I know, the idea of a "sports sandal" doesn't make a huge amount of sense but that isn't the really foolish thing.  The really foolish thing is that little yellow tag in the center there.  I will zoom in on it so that you don't have to squint to read it.

Yes, it says, "waterproof."

 

IT'S A SANDAL WITH HOLES IN IT!  EXACTLY WHAT IS THE "WATERPROOF" PART?

That being said, they are really comfortable and have a reinforced rubber toe that comes over the top.  No more bashing my toes on stuff when I wear them.  Since the weather here is wonderful, I suspect that I will get lots of wear out of them.  

Oh yea, more on "here" later. 

Full Update is in the Offing

No really, I mean it.  I am going to do a full update here shortly.  So much has changed, so much needs to be said.  

Not tonight though.  I don't want to.

By the way, does anyone know if I even use the word offing correctly.  Or even better, is it even a word?

The state of the internet, such that it is…

So, I am spending far too much time and money in McDonalds these days. No no, don’t get me wrong, it isn’t to eat, as I am still on a diet, it is to use the internet. Yea, you may want to re-read that. I am using the T-Mobile hotspot at the McDonalds.

Why, you might ask. Well, so glad you asked.

I went to sign up for internet service the other day. It took forever. I waited in line for nearly an hour to talk to the lone representative only to have him tell me in the first 30 seconds that he couldn’t help me because I owed him money. What!?!?! Apparently, the phone provider that I go through didn’t receive my final payment when I turned off my service before I left for Iraq, over 15 months ago. For some odd reason, even though I clearly remember getting my “final bill” and paying it, they say I owe them 48 euro. Except that it isn’t 48 euro. You see, the bill was turned over to a collection agency and now I owe the collection agency 48 euro and a bunch of fees and probably a bunch of interest. Well that isn’t cool. I now have to search my apartment to find that final bill which I am sure I kept, because, heck I didn’t have much going on the last few days before I deployed.

So what does that have to do with internet you ask? Well, 19 months ago when I moved into this apartment I attempted to get internet hooked up (apparently it is a good thing I failed because that 48 euro would probably be 150 euro) and was told that internet wasn’t available where I live.

What?

Now it isn’t as though I live in some tiny backwater town surrounded by cows. I am a mere 8.4 miles from Schweinfurt, and a quick 2 minutes from a major autobahn. I’m not in the styx here! The problem is that I can’t find out if that situation has been remedied until I pay that outstanding bill or prove to them that I already did. So first, I have to find the bill, then I have to wait 2 weeks while TKS verifies that I actually paid it, then I have to go back to TKS, wait in line again, and then wait 2 weeks for them to tell me that I can’t get internet. Is anyone else here frustrated?

I have to have internet. I just do. Internet is what separates us from monkeys. Yea, I said it, but I don’t have to worry because monkeys aren’t going to come after me because, as I have so definitively pointed out in the previous sentence, monkeys don’t have internet, and this blog is only posted on the internet. I am safe. Monkeys do have art and literature and all that, but not internet. Oh, you need more proof huh, well I read somewhere that I won’t bother remembering where, that there is a monkey somewhere with a typewriter and he has pounded out all of the works of Shakespeare, or will shorty. I have it on good authority. There may also be more than one monkey working on the project, but I am sure it doesn’t matter to my point.

So there you have it, I have provided definitive proof and flawless logic, the internet makes you human. (If you can’t follow, I recommend drinking more and re-reading the blog. Repeat as necessary.)

So here I sit, in McDonalds happily posting to my blog; getting weird looks from the other tables as a laugh maniacally at daydreams of monkeys trying to use the internet. Stupid monkeys.

Oh yea, and occasionally I’m doing my schoolwork too. I think I need some fries now…

I am officially a bike commuter...

... at least in my mind. I have ridden to work before. I did it a handful of times before I deployed. Today though, I consider myself an official bike commuter. Today I did it without the benefit of all of my clothes waiting for me at the office. Heck I did it without the benefit of an office to go to at all. I also did it without the benefit of nice weather. It snowed today.

I got up at 0645. I laid out all of my stuff last night, checked the tire pressure, installed my head and tail lights, put some food in my bag and budgeted an hour and a 45 minutes to get to work and change.

When I looked out the window I saw something that confused me. White. Lots of white. Now admittedly it was merely a sprinkle but to me it looked like a blizzard. Especially since last night was so clear. I expected cold, I didn't expect snow.

So I made the 20 second decision to go ahead and ride in, despite the weather. I tossed a couple of extra clothing items in my bag and then just got to it. It was fantastic. I had a blast. It wasn't too cold, I had no problem with traction, and I left early enough that I didn't have to push myself (traction again.) The only issue I had was once I got into town the snow went away and I had wet roads instead of snowy trails. I started getting damp. I got to work in about an hour and then had time to eat and change before anyone got there.

So now I am sitting at the library on post contemplating my ride home. This might suck a bit. The damp clothing has not subsided and while my base layers are dry the outer ones aren't, nor are my gloves. Guess I will have to break out the extra gloves and socks. No problem.

I won't say that I am morally superior to everyone who drove in today, but then again I shouldn't have to, it should be obvious.

HA!

Oh yea, and despite the weather, I grinned like an idiot the whole way in. I think I chapped my teeth.